I’m sure you’re all dying to know what an important, go getting idiot like me does on a day off. Well, let me illuminate your minds and nourish your souls…
This morning I spent a few precious moments watching my cat sitting on a box. Now don’t pooh pooh me yet, you haven’t heard the magical part. It is actually day three of my observations, I’m waiting to see if it collapses. Earlier I heard it rip, so this shit’s just got exciting.
I then settled down to write a proposal for work, but got bored within 10 minutes after realising I sound like a knob.
I had my daily practice of pulling stupid faces in the mirror. If you don’t frequently train your muscles they will go into spasm, resulting in a constant look of constipation, diagonal teeth and general cuntiness. This is a genuine trauma that I feel needs to be brought into the public’s consciousness. I’m considering Piers Morgan as a figurehead.
I then headed over to twitter and gazed upon some photos of joy. Why not take a look. I do love Ricky Gervais
Now I may play a couple of rounds of backgammon to exhilarate my mind, then I guess I’d better get down to some writing.
No, I’m not wasting my life